Good Examples from Student Papers

From Essay #2:

The key words often written on papers: give an example.
Too often students provide generalizations but not supporting detail or example.
Here is an excerpt from a paper in which a student supports his generalization with a detail.

Commercials should tell a story, like reading a book. They should hve an introduction, topic, body, and then an ending. If you start to get away from that, you don't have the viewer interested any more and they're probably ready to change the channel. The Super Bowl commercial with the man who buys a Dorito eating goat, then tries to get rid of the goat because it eats all of his Doritos is a good example of a commercial that tells a story.

From Classwork--writing a Comparison/Contrast Thesis Statement:

Most people today have hectic lives. With everyone being pressed for time, it can be difficult to sit down and watch the news. Therefore, most people pull up the news with their smart phones or tablets. Having online news websites, such as CNN and CBS, at such an easy access, are very convenient. But deciding which one to use can be a challenge. CNN is known for its appealing headlines and in-depth information. CBS is known for its concise, straight to the point, brief articles.